Hollywood Mystery: Natalie Wood

It is a strange story, even by Hollywood standards. It happened in 1981, so, with the passage of time you would think the interest would go away. The shelf life on any story is no more than a blink of the eye nowadays. Still, this case sputters on. And, now, with the reopening of the investigation--- and, the rumors which are getting stronger--- we may finally learn what happened that November night when Natalie Wood drowned...... The facts are these: Natalie Wood, 43 years of age, was found floating in the Pacific Ocean, just off  Santa Catalina Island on the morning of November 29, 1981. She had been in the water several hours before her death. A small, rubber inflatable dinghy was nearby. The autopsy report said that she had a blood alcohol level of 0.14, almost twice over the legal limit. She had two types of prescription drugs in her system, one for motion sickness and one that was a painkiller. Both drugs were legally prescribed by her doctor. However, because she had these drugs in her system, when mixed with the alcohol, this made her even more intoxicated. There were also bruises on her body and arms and an abrasion on her left cheek. The coroner, Thomas Noguchi, concluded that the bruises had occured when she fell in the water, perhaps, hitting the boat or dinghy along the way of the fall. Natalie Wood was on the boat with her husband, Robert Wagner, and, also two other men, fellow actor Christopher Walken, and the ship's captain, Dennis Davern. All three men later testified that after a night of dinner and drinks, the two actors went to bed and Natalie stayed up. After the men retired, nobody saw her again. After a certain amount of time, Wagner became concerned that he could not find his wife anywhere on the boat. After checking with Walken and Davern, Wagner called the shore patrol, who then alerted the police. Robert Wagner told the authorities that his wife was missing and that a dinghy was also missing from the boat. The police asked Wagner if he thought that Natalie would have taken the dinghy out by herself. Robert Wagner did not think so. His wife was terrified of deep water...... The coroners office, working with the L.A. police, concluded that it was an accidental drowning. No foul play involved. It seemed like a sad ending to one of Hollywood's most popular stars. From childhood star in ''Miracle On 34th Street'' to ''Splendor In The Grass'' to ''West Side Story'', Natalie Wood seemed to have a charmed life. She was beautiful, popular, certainly dated around with the famous, and, was generally well-liked in the industry. She was married [ for the second time ] to Robert Wagner, himself a well-liked, if lightweight actor. They had children together and seemed to be the Golden Couple. Natalie Wood seemed to be on top of the world. There appeared to be no dark clouds in her life. Her only fear in life, of all things, was of drowning in deep, dark water....... Soon after the investigation was closed, the rumors started. Natalie Wood, it was determined by police, decided either to get away from the boat for awhile and took the dinghy out into the water, or,  perhaps, she heard the dinghy knocking against the boat and tried to untie it and then fell in. There was a story that a boat nearby heard a woman crying for help in the middle of the night. This voice was pleading for someone to save her from the water. The nearby boat frantically searched for the source of the cry, but, found nothing. If this story is true--- and the police did check out the lead, but, found nothing came of it---- then why did not Wagner, Walken , and Davern not here the same voice? If Natalie accidently fell in the water, unless she knocked herself out somehow, there must have been some call for help from her. She was conscious, according to the coroner, for a little while. Why did the three men not hear her?......... There have been other rumors of this night that have always made the rounds in the gossip mill. One story was that Wood and Walken were having an affair. They both, at the time of her death, were co-starring in a forgettable movie together called, ''Brainstorm''. The stories that came from the set of the movie of a location fling between these two already were widespread. Robert Wagner must have heard them. Wagner himself, the star of the TV series, ''Hart To Hart'', was the subject of much gossip directed at the chemistry he and his co-star, Stefanie Powers had. Surely, Natalie Wood must have heard these rumors also. Why, Walken was invited on that ship that night has always kept people wondering. Allegedly, there was some kind of fierce verbal fight between Wagner and Walken at dinner that night. Over Natalie, perhaps? Another rumor that night was that the three were engaged in a threesome. And, there has also been the open question of why Natalie had bruises on her. Did she receive them before or after she went into the water? Finally, the big question: why did a woman, notorious for her fear of dark water, attempt to go out alone on a dangerously small dinghy in the middle of the night?..... Something else happened in this story. For years the pieces did not add up to a logical conclusion. What did the boat's captain know? Does he know more and was paid for his silence. Or, does he know nothing and is innocent in this? Was Natalie Wood beaten by someone on the boat before her drowning? Maybe, by a jealous husband, with alcohol in his system, confronting his wife's lover? And, what is Walken's role in all of this? What does he know? Both Walken and Wagner have dodged this question for decades. Walken denied having an affair with Natalie. But, a public denial does not mean that nothing happened between the two of them. And, Robert Wagner. He sure rebounded quickly after his wife's death. Within months, he was living with his future wife, Jill St. John. We are talking only a few months after Natalie's death. Mr. Grieving Husband sure was in a hurry to run to another woman's arms...... So, recently, we have the investigation reopened. There might be something to these rumors after all. The coroners office and the police have determined that Natalie Wood may have received her bruises prior to hitting the water. If this was true, then there was a raging male on board who gave her these marks. Someone who was  angry enough at her to possibly do harmful and deadly damage to her. There are only three who could have done this, remember. And, finally, the boat's captain, Dennis Davern, has come out within the last year and said that there was indeed an argument that night between the three actors. Why he has kept his silence this long is a mystery [ usually, when someone breaks a silence, money is the reason ]. But, his speaking up cannot be dismissed. He would be a reliable witness, certainly, the most important. Wagner and Walken continue to deny any foul play, but, if I was Wagner [ whom I have always suspected ] I would be a little worried. I am sure he has contacted a lawyer recently...... The coroner's office has amended the death certificate these last few days in the death of Natalie Wood. The cause of death went from being ''accidental drowning'' to ''undetermined''......

Vegas, Baby!!!

Cool just seemed to surround them like air does us mere mortals. It oozed from them. When they walked, stood still, smoked a cigarette [ always holding it like Bogart did ] and, of course, when they performed, cool was their constant companion. Only one of them was a truly fine actor, but, two of them were exciting to watch in their own right, and, the other two were harmless filler. They were not equals--- either in talent or personality. They had one Leader. He strode the planet like a man picked by God to lead his minions. Maybe, he was. They had swagger, good-looks, self-confidence, and charisma. They were saddled with a name that they abhorred, but, it was the name that they public embraced. They were The Rat Pack...... Mythology has long surrounded this group. They are all long gone to the other side, but, the startling image that they projected is stronger than ever. We know of their story, with the broads and the booze and the horseplay that was their M.O. And, truth be told, when they were on stage together, they seemed more intent on entertaining themselves than the audience. Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, and Sammy Davis Jr were electric performers when they performed solo, but, onstage with Peter Lawford and Joey Bishop they all acted like immature teenagers. Entertaining as hell, I grant you. However, if you wanted a solid performance, it was better to see them when they performed alone..... The first-- and, best--- of the famous Rat Pack movies, is''Oceans's Eleven''. The story is simple: old war buddies gather in Las Vegas on New Years Eve to rob all of the big casinos at once. The movie is slight in quality. But, it soars tremendously in fun. They were playing towards the camera and the audience is in on the fun as fellow henchmen and women. They were having a raving ole time and wanted us to get close to the action. And, they succeeded. Normally, this type of smirking and winking borders on megalomania and arrogance [ see Burt Reynolds movies with a speeding car ]. Somehow, though, all is forgiven and we, the audience, enjoy ourselves because we know they are enjoying themselves on the old big silver screen. Following the plot is not necessary. Just sit back with a cocktail and enjoy the fun..... The filming of this movie was some story!! Sinatra, as we all know, had power over everyone. He convinced the casinos of Vegas in early 1960 to let him and his buddies shoot their little caper movie and not be bothered. They shot the movie during the day and performed two shows a night at the Sands. Then, the action really started!!! The boys would hit the casino to do a little gambling. People, us mortals, gathered around them to watch and gawk. They were still relatively young, and, certainly, vibrant. After the gambling--- which always included women and the ever present consumption of booze--- they would head to Frank's lavish suite in the Sands and party until the wee small hours of the morning. More women and booze followed. And, then the boys would find the partners to pair up with for the evening [ except for Joey Bishop, who was faithful to his wife and usually did not make the after-show scene]. Wild scenes of debauchery are always associated with rock stars, but, these men blazed a trail with their partying that other, future musicians, rushed to emulate. Frank was the most dedicated to having fun with the fairer sex. Hookers, showgirls, and regular ladies of the day and evening would go in and out of his bed, sometimes as many as three with Sinatra at once. Sometimes, there would be John Kennedy in the suite to party with the Pack. Sometimes, mobsters like Sam Giancana to mix it up with the group. Anyone who liked a good time was welcome. Frank called it ''Ring-A-Ding-Ding'' time. Sexual freedom and hard drinking and blowing off firecrackers reigned all night long. When the next day would arrive, these men, bleary-eyed and hungover, would stagger to the Sands steam room to clear the body of toxins. Then, they would head to the movie set to start the process all over again. Many days were spent going on no, or, very little sleep. When you are these Titans and live like they did, sleep is just an irritant in life anyway..... Frank Sinatra was a supreme talent. If he hadn't had been the greatest and most influential singer of the 20th Century, then he would have made his mark as an extraordinary actor with limitless range. Not in this movie, but, many others in his career, Frank showed a stellar ability to bring a character to life and give it his all. You wanna see Frank excel in a role? Check out the original ''Manchurian Candidate''. He shows a sensitivity and vulnerability absent from the lark of his Rat Pack films. Always compelling to watch sing, Frank showed such promise as an actor that he seriously considered giving up singing to concentrate fully on acting. Wisely, he stayed with singing. However, this multi-talented man [ arguably the most talented man in the history of performing] could have succeeded in anything he attempted..... Dean Martin and Sammy Davis Jr also showed some chops as actors. Both seemed to be happy playing second and third fiddle to their Leader. Sammy, a bundle of talent and drive, was the little brother in the group. He was constantly teased, affectionately, and, at times, cruelly, as younger brothers are. All of these men fought the prejudices of the day. Sammy was caught in the hypocracy of being able to entertain in the main room at the Sands, but, he had to enter the hotel through the rear entrance. At first, he was not allowed to stay at the hotel that he was earning money for. Frank stepped in and changed the color barrier for not only Sammy, but, all blacks in Vegas. Frank championed civil rights his whole life. However, he and Dean would cross the line of taste onstage when teasing Sammy. Make no mistake, they loved Sammy and would have killed for him. But, some of the lines bordered on racism. Sammy  laughed, and, as he later related, gritted his teeth at some of the barbs. It was explained by defenders of Frank and Dean that by making fun of the stereotypes in race realtions they were bringing down the borders and prejudices of the day. That was stretching it a little bit. Every race and nationality should always be open for the sport of humor[ Frank and Dean called each other Dago], but, when it came to Sammy they were a bit too cruel. Sammy, however, always knew they loved him. There was a genuine feeling of love and respect that the Top Three in the group had for each other..... Dean Martin was the loner of the three. He liked his booze and women, but, did it quietly on his own terms. Many nights after being onstage he would stop by Frank's suite just for a drink or two and excuse himself by saying ''I have a broad waiting for me in my room.'' They did not believe him, but, because he was Dean, he was excused from Frank's orbit. Dean wanted solitude away from the madness. He did hook up with women--- many times there was in fact a women waiting in his room for him. And, many times, he was alone in his room, sipping milk and watching one of his beloved western films on TV. He also wanted to get to bed relatively early because he loved early morning golf. While he and Frank were the best of friends, Dean never did have all the devotion and obsession of Sinatra that Sammy did. Frank could walk on water in Sammy's view. Dean had a cooler impression of the Leader. He viewed him as an equal. This gave him a great gift: Frank Sinatra's respect......Peter Lawford and Joey Bishop were the scraps in the group. Lawford owed his membership in the Pack because of his family connections. He wife, Pat, was the sister of John F Kennedy, soon to run for President Of The United States in 1960. Peter was a lighweight but charming man of modest talent. No great shakes as an actor or singer. He was the good-looking mascot not to be taken seriously. Like Sammy, he idolized Frank. He got girls for Frank, who then got girls for Jack Kennedy. That was the bond of all three men. Three swingers enjoying showgirls galore. It shows you the morals of Jack Kennedy that he was partying with his brother-in-law who was married to his sister. But, cheating Lawford was, and the showgirls flew in and out of Jack's and Frank's rooms. One of these girls was named Judith Campbell. She was one of Frank's girls whom Kennedy fancied. Soon, the Senator from Massachusetts and the Party Girl Campbell were lovers. Not long after they started their two year affair, Frank introduced Campbell to another friend of his, Chicago mobster Sam Giancana. The future President and the most powerful mobster in the country shared Judith Campbell as a mistress. And, all because of Frank Sinatra. He wasn't called the Leader for nothing....... Joey Bishop was only in the Pack because he made Frank laugh. Joey was a minor comedian of not much talent. His whole career unfolded because of his connection to Frank Sinatra. He would have some success later on in his career with talk shows and small parts in movies. Still, he was the odd man out. If you were to redisgn the Rat Pack I would put Don Rickles as the fifth member. His style of lethal humor would have blended very well with the antics of the Rat Pack. Imagine, the jokes Rickles would have made about the Mafia onstage!!!..... There is a scene in ''Ocena's Eleven'' that has been a strong rumor for years. About a third of the way through the movie Frank strolls into the casino. He passes several tables, all with the people turned away from the camera. One dark haired man sitting there is of note. This ''extra'' would eleven months later be elected President Of The United States...... The weeks filming ''Ocean's Eleven'' were in January and February of 1960 in Las Vegas. Then, they hightailed it to Hollywood to finish it. The movie came out the following August and was a rousing success. The public flocked to this film with its weak plot to have some fun [ or, ''hey, hey'', as Frank called it]. The movie is great fun because we all know that we were eavesdropping a little of these famous men and how they lived their lives. For most men, there is a little fantasy in our minds to live life like they did. No rules. Nobody telling you what to do and how to behave. No time clocks and no restrictions. Male bonding at its best. Five men showing the world their performing talents and their intense loyalty towards each other. And, the booze mixed with the broads. Show me a man who hasn't once or twice, in his mind, planted himself in this group and I will show you a man who doesn't know what a good time is. Those of us who believe in monogamy and the love of a good women can also appreciate the thought of tearing up the town....... The Sands is long gone, along with The Rat Pack. The magic days of ''Ring-A-Ding-Ding'' ended with the death of JFK in 1963. Soon, rock and roll took over and the Rat Pack became old hat. They aged and grew mortal--- something that they never thought would happen to them. Lawford was thrown out of the group when Sinatra felt he was disloyal when JFK snubbed a visit to Frank's home. Frank took his rage out on Peter and closed his friendship with the British actor. Lawford tried and failed to get back in Frank's orbit. He would divorce Pat Kennedy, and, he would lose control with booze and drugs as the years went on. He died in 1984, never reunited with Frank.....Sammy was next to go. Years of alcohol, drug, and nicotine abuse took its toll on this little man and he died in 1990..... Dean died in 1995. He had a strong career for many years after the Vegas days with the boys and was one of the biggest stars around for a long time. But, in 1987, Dean lost his son, Dino Jr, in a plane crash and grieved himself to death. He became a recluse. Frank tried to save him, but, Dean did not want to be saved. He died as he lived. A loner, who went out on his own terms......The Leader was next. Frank still tore up all life around him into his 80's. Still drinking and smoking like a young man. The broads fell away with his fourth and last marriage to Barbara Marx. He toured the world relentlessly to massive audiences. Age caught up with him in the 1990's. Bladder cancer and heart problems. He died in 1998 of a heart attack. He died kicking and screaming into death. He went to the ''Big Casino'' His Way.......Joey Bishop lived out his final years quietly with his wife. No alcohol or smoking for him. He passed away in 2007 of old age...... The Sands imploded in 1996 to make way for the Venetian Hotel. I was in the Sands the year before it closed. The Copa Room, where the Rat Pack reigned, was no longer. When I went back in 1999, I saw a plaque on the floor of the Venetian. It was where the old Copa Room was supposed to be. Myself and various other people stopped for a few moments over this little monument to fun. Perhaps, without saying much, we were all thinking the same thoughts. We were listening for the ghosts of glories past. We were trying to catch lightning in a bottle for a lost time. We were trying to hear five men, full of life and energy, entertaining in a way that would never come again.... And, I'm sure we all wished we could go back for a little while to have some ''Ring-A-Ding-Ding''........

America Honors

Having been off for a few weeks I have been able to catch up on some long-overdue TV watching. I rented the old series ''Night Gallery'' from the early 1970's. This show was the follow up series for the great Rod Serling after his legendary ''Twilight Zone'' show. ''Night Gallery'' is a program I have dim memories of as a kid. My Dad loved it, but, it scared the hell out of me when I was a small boy. The show now, some forty years later, still holds up. And, true to form, I was a little rattled by some of the episodes. I watched them as you should with a show like this: alone, late at night, in the dark. I recommend the rental for anyone interested in these types of shows. I also caught up-- via YouTube--- the yearly program ''The Kennedy Center Honors''...... This show does what it advertises. It honors those artists in the performing arts. It is a marvelous cross-section of the creative. This year they honored: Dustin Hoffman, David Letterman, Chicago bluesman Buddy Guy, ballerina Natalia Nakarova, and, most surprisingly, Led Zeppelin. If you have never seen the show, it consists of the honorees sitting in the balcony of the Kennedy Center, surrounded by family and friends, and, the President and First Lady. Each artist is given about twenty minutes in tribute. The selection of those asked to honor the honorees usually is reflected on those who have followed them in the same field and are most influenced by the award winner. The honoree sits and listens as his or her life is reenacted. It is part tribute, and, part celebration of said person. It is not fawning in the least. Rather, it is a respectful thank you to this person for advancing the cause of the artist. A tear is shed by the artist towards the loving way they are celebrated. Sometimes, the viewer will share along with that tear.... Dustin Hoffman batted lead-off for the show. Robert DeNiro came out and saluted his fellow thespian. A series of clips is standard in this show. For a few minutes the viewer is taken back in time through the work of the artist. With Dustin Hoffman, it is a rich, rewarding experience. A trailblazer because on his non-matinee idol looks, Dustin opened the door for those people who followed in his footsteps that might not have been the best-looking in class, but, they sure were the most talented. With the Hoffman clips the viewer is reminded what a national treasure this man is. From ''The Graduate'' on, he made watching acting a pleasure. Consider some of his titles, ''Midnight Cowboy'', ''Little Big Man'', ''Lenny'', ''Papillon'', ''All The President's Men'', ''Marathon Man'', Kramer vs Kramer'', ''Tootsie'', ''Rainman'', ''Wag The Dog'', etc, no one actor of the last forty years has shown the tremendous range that this man has. A notorious perfectionist and pain in the ass to work with, all of his colleagues testify that Dustin is like this not out of ego, but, a sense of purpose to make the work shine. Such a drive always needs to be applauded and not condemned. A few other, younger actors saluted him like, Liev Schroeber and Naomi Watts. They are the children of this man's influence. As is any actor who has followed his lead...... Ballet is not my forte. I have respect for any performer with talent, but, I will be damned if I could tell you anything about this art form. It seems to be about timing and discipline and constant attention to detail. There is a beauty to this dance. I will not disrespect this profession by commenting on it more, but, Natalia Nakarova, sitting on the balcony with all the others, sure deserves whatever accolades thrown at her. I do not know if I would ever follow ballet, but, for a few minutes on the broadcast, it was a pleasure being taken into this world...... Buddy Guy's name holds awe in the music business. People from Clapton to Richards, to anyone who has ever held a guitar cherises his influence. He came along in the blues scene in the late 1950's/ early 1960's period. British music was about to explode all over the world and the British stars learned their trade from black American bluesmen. Muddy Waters was front and center, along with John Lee Hooker. And, so, quietly, was Buddy Guy. He played the guitar like God Himself taught him the chords personally. A wailing sound emerged from his fingertips. In a fast-paced song that had everybody up dancing and singing, his guitar drove the action wherever it needed to go. In a sad song, his guitar cried the electrified tears of the sorrowful and lonely. He never rang the bell when it came to a Number One hit, but, popularity can be very deceiving. Madonna is popular, but, certainly no artist. Buddy Guy gave the spirit of the blues its backbone, crossing ethnic lines and bringing people together. Perhaps, that is his greatest legacy. The music stays in your soul and brings forth the hidden and unexplained euphoria that all good music does. I saw him live several years ago at his club in downtown Chicago. He played the guitar like a master, of course, but, he also lit up the crowd with his intense energy. The highlight of the show was when Buddy wandered the crowd with his guitar so his fans could experience him up close and personal. Then, he got more personal by walking into the ladies room and playing from there [ his bar, his rules ]! The Kennedy Center brought out the people he inspired: Bonnie Raitt, Jeff Beck, Tracy Chapman. While the man watched, they played him his music. From their souls to his. Also, ours...... Jimmy Kimmel, Alec Baldwin, Tina Fey, and Ray Romano all came out to honor Dave. That is what we came him. Dave. Any formal title like David seems so ill-suited for this blue-collar prince from Indiana. Which is why it is so ironically funny that Dave should be honored at something like this. He deserves the honor, certainly, but, has spent his whole career making fun of taking show business so seriously. This was the crux of what Baldwin and Company took with them on stage when talking about Letterman. How funny they all found it that Dave was sitting there being honred by his country and HE COULD NOT UTTER A WORD IN PROTEST!!! Dave takes compliments like the rest of us take getting a root canal. But, he gamely sat there and listened while his history was played out. And, David Letterman should be rightly proud of his place in the world. Starting out in Indiana in college radio and local TV [ he was a weatherman!] Dave followed his dream to be a stand-up comedian with moving out to Hollywood. His ultimate dream was to be on ''The Tonight Show'' with his idol, Johnny Carson. After a few years he was asked on and hit a home run. Johnny [ another person of whom we only needed one name for ] was immediately taken with Dave and asked him to sit in for him to guest host. This led to his career going through the roof, and, eventually, Johnny gave Dave the plum job of following ''The Tonight Show'' with his own show, ''Late Night With David Letterman''. It started in 1982, and, from then on comedy has never been the same. Every comedian who does a talk show now--- including Letterman's rival and one time friend, Jay Leno--- is influenced, and, in some cases, outright steals, from Dave. His speciality is ironic, sarcastic humor. In short, he is America's greatest smart-ass. When he came to CBS in the early 90's, Dave shifted his comedy to become more a commentator of current life than he had been before. In the aftermath of 9/11, Dave led the way back to normal life by being the first entertainer to go back to work. That show, about a week after the tragedy, remains David Letterman's finest moment as a performer and human being. He spoke from the heart and expressed the shock and pain of a country. It seemed all ad-libbed. All good emotions come spontaneously. Dave delivered genuine human feeling that could only come from a caring person. The person they honored that night at the Kennedy Center was the comedian. And, the sweet man buried beneath his insecurity. I thought I saw Dave's eyes wet from the tribute. I hope he likes himself a little more after this, and, finally realizes what a treasure he is..... I must admit to being shocked by Led Zeppelin being honored. Their music needs not to be defended. It took the blues of America and melded it with hard rocking British poverty to create one of the finest bands ever. Other than the Beatles, no other band in music history has influenced more generations than Plant, Page, Jones, and Bonham. No, their music remains above reproach. Rather, what stunned me is that once upon a time, Led Zeppelin was considered the ''Devil's Music''. Beyond dark and shocking, this music bordered on the menacing and, sometimes, frightening. They freely embraced Satan and all his power. Look at some old footage from way back in time. All they needed was Rosemary's Baby to show up at the concert to make the picture complete. This was the music your parents warned you against listening to. And, naturally, that made you want to listen to it more. Led Zeppelin had to be listened to at a friend's house because Mom and Dad would have thrown your album out had they known you had it. But, lost in all the imagery was a solid, working class group of musicians who played against the forces of nature. They were howling at life and trying to find the lightness through the dark. They seemed to find that lightness in the years that followed. They grew up and realized that they didn't need all the bullshit Satanism to make their statement. The music did it for them. Jimmy Page remains a true rock God. I can think of no other guitarist in rock who is more admired and imitated [ yes, including Hendrix ]. His name is spoken with awe from musicians. Robert Plant, along with Jagger and Morrison, defined the raw sexual energy of a lead singer. He also possessed the best scream in music. When he howled at those forces in nature it was the howl from his deepest primal soul. John Paul Jones, the underrated member of the group, was its driving force in terms of musicianship and artistry. And, the late John Bonham--- Bonzo--- played drums liked the madman he was. With Keith Moon as his rival with The Who, Bonham attacked the skins like he was fighting for his life. When he died in 1980, it was a testament to him that the band immediately disbanded. All that was left was their influence. That influence showed up on the stage at the Kennedy Center with artists such as Heart, Lenny Kravitz, Foo Fighters, and Kid Rock. The performance of ''Stairway To Heaven'' is really something to see. Watching from their seats, Plant, Page, and Jones saw their ''Devil's Music'' being celebrated by a country that was frightened by them. Now, a President was sitting only a few feet away..... America has always embraced the artist. The artist goes back to the spirit of why this country was formed. Artists almost always come from humble origins. They chase the big dream, as all Americans have been taught to do. So, in a way, ''The Kennedy Center Honors'' is very much a wonderful thing. Unlike, say, the Oscars, which reward ego and commerce, ''The Kennedy Center Honors'' celebrate the person and the achievement without money and stardom mixed in.... When the show starts, all of the honorees take a collective bow for the audience. And, then for the next couple of hours, America bows back......

Just.... Go Away

Now that the final days of the year are counting down I must give a few comments. This is the time of the year when there are lists of people who have died, mostly famous, but, some who are not generally known to all of us. These lists remind us, ''Oh, yeah, I forgot he died in this year''. So, it is with great relish that I give a few moments of my time to the people who I wish would go away forever. Now, mind you, I am not advocating their deaths---- for I am all love. But, rather, I just state my irritation that they continue to suck up favorable oxygen and are complete wastes of skin. So, here were go...... Any Politician. It is sure easy to want nothing good to happen to these shysters who pretend to have our--- ha, ha,---- best interests at heart. However, I do wish them some success because it trickles down to us when they do well. But, they aren't doing well. I never heard the term''Fiscal Cliff'' before [ sounds like a Pink Floyd album]. Apparently, this means that we are going fast over an possible economic collapse. The major players in this, the President and Speaker Boehner want the best for us. They wanna save us, but, those darn rascals in the other party won't cooperate!!! So, they are in a stalemate. Which could bring everything crashing down. To see the leader of the free world, and, his Republican opposite argue about who is wrong shows us, once again, the pig-headedness of politics. These stooges got us into this muck, now, they wanna save us. And, how are we going to be saved? Well, dear class, through more money leaving all our pockets, to be put into theirs. The system is so screwed up that we can no longer blame a single party, or, economic plan. Share the burden, boys. Fix the problem with the decency of a human being. And, then Go Away...... Tom Cruise and John Travolta. Come on, guys, we all know that you are closet dicksmokers. The rumors about the ''Scientology Boys'' have been prancing around since they became famous. Rumors usually die after a year or two, but, with these two, the rumors have only gotten stronger. Travolta was the subject of two lawsuits this year from people who were paid to give him a ''massage''. Now, to be fair, both lawsuits were thrown out of court. That doesn't mean that there wasn't some merit to what was alleged, only that there was no, ahem, hard evidence. A more reliable witness to the life of Travolta comes in the form of his good friend, Carrie Fisher. She stated a couple of years ago that all of his friends know of his behavior and have no problem with it. So, Fisher says, he should come clean [ stop giggling]. And, Tommy Cruise? Our Top Gun in Hollywood still tries to play macho with his toy movies. Once again, Cruise is saving the world for the good of Scientology in his latest film, ''Jack Reacharound'', or, whatever it is called. I made a Facebook joke several months ago about how auditions for his new ''wife'' must be a hot ticket for any actress with ambition and no self-esteem. Well, I wasn't far off!!! Several reliable publications have stated that he is, in fact, searching for his new wife. Good God!!! Is this poor son of a bitch screwed up!!!! Both actors should come forward and say the truth. Their days of matinee idol status are long gone. Their movies bring in a fraction of what they used to, so, obviously, the public is not buying their fiction. So, come out of the closet, boys. And, then, Go Away.... The Kardashians and the Jersey Shore casts. I know. This is a slam-dunk. What more needs to be said about this brainless lot? Well, not much about them, but, a lot about their audience who continue to watch this mental train wreck without seeing the light of knowledge. Yes, I understand the theory of many people who say that they watch knowing full well that it is insulting to anyone's intelligence. They see the joke, so, that is why they do not take it seriously. Ok, I will grant some people that, for the sake of the argument. However, what these people do fail apparently to understand is that network executives do not care why you watch, just that you watch. They are making money regardless of the audiences intentions. Why anyone would willingly sink to the level of this trash is beyond my scope of understanding. They are being used, just like the morons who watch and believe they are seeing unscripted, ''reality'' TV. Most of the audience fails to grasp the manipulations that go into programs like this. It is the equivalent of acting like a moron because other people act that way, ignoring the truth that they all a re in the same cesspool and should be judged as one. Many people I know and love watch this dreck and it stumps me of why they do it. So, the best thing is for these cretins on the show-- and, their makers--- to just Go Away..... How about people on Facebook who post EVERYTHING AND EVERY THOUGHT that they have? There are some great thinkers on FB. But, I do not need to hear about how you just had a great political thought, or, about your most recent bowel movement [ the case can be made that these two thoughts can be one in the same]. Another thing that frosts me is when people steal well-known thoughts of famous people and use them as their own without giving due credit to the author. So, if you must be an egotist and share every brilliant thought and reflection on life, please, do not do it on FB. Do it the old-fashioned way: write a blog. Go Away...... Jimmy Fallon. I have to scratch my head until I am bloody to figure out if this shithead has ever done anything even remotely funny. He sure thinks he has. Every once in a while a performer will rise to the top of the entertainment world without any scrap of talent. Fallon is this generation's symbol. He was not funny on ''SNL'' when he was on, with his smirking and ''look how funny I am in this sketch because I can't keep a straight face'' way of performing. His talk show is not really a talk show. It is just a way for him to go from one bad impression to another with a occasional stop with talking to a hapless guest. And, his commercials should be used by medical people to induce vomiting, so painful that they are. I don't get it. I have a fairly strong knowledge of comedy. Even some comedians I do not like I concede have talent, like Billy Crystal or Mike Myers. But, Fallon stumps me. Why Lorne Michaels put all his faith into this guy is an open question. Lorne, who still produces the comatose ''SNL'', has long lost whatever ability to spot funny people. Maybe, because of Lorne Michaels standing in the show business industry, Fallon flourishes. I don't know. I do know that Jimmy Fallon needs to Go Away...... Finally, the year ended with an unspeakable tragedy in a school in Newtown. Nothing more needs to be said about this horror. What needs to be said is how every year we seem to sink more and more into the abyss of murder. Society has become a killing machine, as never before in our history. Why? Well, partly--- and, it is a big part---- because of what we watch. I am one of those who blame Hollywood and video games for adding to the mind of a psycho with the endless displays of violence and destruction. I saw the great director, Quentin Tarantino, recently interviewed on the subject. As much as a fan I am of his work I also concede that he just does not get the link between movie mayhem and real-life mayhem. He defended the right of the artist to express himself in any way that he wants. Well, that is true in terms of artistic license, but, he fails to make a convincing case for society not being influenced by it. Tarantino is on the other side of life, so, part of what he says can be excused as someone living in a bubble of comfort. But, he is very wrong about the influence violence has on society. Walk into any mall and hear the talk, or, see the wardrobe being worn by young adults. It is out of any movie or hip-hop song. Popular movies and music nowadays, more often than not, express rage and disrespect at all society. There has always been that speck of rebellion throughout the generations of youth, but, never more deep and never more hateful, than we see now. The biggest influences on teeneagers and young adults is music and movies and video games. And, most preach some kind of violence on society. Is it any wonder that deeply disturbed individuals, after being constantly exposed to all this madness and dark impulses, break down mentally and lash out. Some do it verbally. Some physically. And, some take out a gun from somewhere and fire at the innocent. I have never believed in censorship across the board because it does curtail originality to some degree. Still, the mindless violence should be policed. Never before have we had this problem. As I write this, there is a commercial playing advertising the remake of ''The Texas Chainsaw Massacre In 3D''. I guarantee that some disturbed minds will find this movie to be an outlet for their horrible thoughts. And, somewhere in these misguided minds, a seed of violence is being planted. This type of entertainment cannot be tolerated anymore. It needs to Go Away...... Remember, I am still all about love. These thoughts are just a few nuggets of what sticks in my craw from time to time. I'm sure that you have yours. However, let me wish you all ''Happy New Year'', full of good health and wealth and good memories. I will see most of you throughout the year and let us all have good times. Cheers!!!!..........

I Will Always Believe

The children were waiting patiently. As patiently as children can wait. They lined up with Mom, and, or Dad. They were waiting for HIM. The Big Guy. The big, fat guy with the beard and the red suit. He only comes once a year, as they very well know, so, this visit was very important in their young minds. I'm sure each child wondered if they had been naughty or nice the past year. HE knew. As we learn, naughty does not get presents from Santa, only nice. From my untrained parental eye I would put these kids who were in front of me in the ''nice'' column. They sure had a lot of energy and smiles. The only truly great line for a person to wait in is for Santa Claus. I got in line..... Perhaps, because of the recent horrors inflicted on children, I felt the need to be in that line. It was a shopping mall. Recently, a mall was invaded by a madman who destroyed lives. And, the searing horror of an elementary school being the scene of unbelievable carnage and mayhem involving children. This time of the year is for children. There should be no sign of life flexing its cruelty on them. Innocence and sweet joy should be experienced. Not death. We are only young for a blink of an eye and every drop of that youth should be enjoyed to the fullest. Santa Claus has always been the universal sign of that sweetness and joy of life. That glorious, faraway figure in the sky who descends down to bring what he or she most desires, a present. And, wrapped in that present is the spirit of love. Every child is entitled to feel it...... I remember fondly my belief in Santa. I have golden memories of lying in bed and listening closely to the sounds of the roof on our house. There were times when I thought I heard the reindeer land. Santa must be there. Now, I was told to stay in bed all night because you were not supposed to see Santa. That part was magic. He was a phantom, a wonderful image on a childs mind. But, I must confess to falling to curiosity of seeing him in the flesh. I would sneak downstairs and try to catch him. I do not know if we left cookies and millk for him. Knowing my family, it was probably cheeseballs and pizza and gnocchi. I would tiptoe around the presents that were already laid out by my parents----- usually bumping into my brother who was doing the same thing as me---- and see if Santa had been there yet. Alas, the rascal had not shown yet. Up the stairs and back in bed I went, giving him a little more time. He had to be close!!!! The TV news showed his sleigh on the radar!!! He just had to be close!!!!....... Santa was always good to my family. But, even at my young, tender age, I was aware that other children were going without. My Mom and Dad, those angels of good heart and soul, always told us that there were kids in the world who were too poor to receive gifts. I remember watching the late, great Johnny Carson read actual letters from little kids requesting what they wanted for Christmas from Santa. Many of these letters were hilarious, but, many were small cries of pain for any gift from Santa. There was not a dry eye in the house as Carson read these sad pleas, including Johnny himself. I always wondered if Santa would give them gifts. My Mom and Dad skittered around my questions of why these children couldn't get gifts like we all did. It was very wise of Mom and Dad to do this because the truth would be very painful to learn for a child. I thank them for keeping me in blissful denial of reality. However, my parents always made sure that we had those poor kids in our thoughts and prayers. And, typical of Mom and Dad, they gave to charities and organizations who helped the poor and needy. In my childhood, my parents always stressed helping out those less fortunate. Children were front and center to receive help...... Back then, we opened gifts on Christmas morning. We could each open one gift Christmas Eve, but, that was it. Which made sense because Santa came in the middle of the night. It must have happened when I fell asleep for that short time, I would tell myself. I missed him again!!!, Somehow, Santa got in the house and quietly left our gifts and slipped back out without anyone noticing. He would have made a great CIA agent.... In time, the magic and wonder of believing in Santa goes away. Perhaps, this is the first sign for the child that the world is filled with disappointment. That realization that Santa is not real. I was told the full story at whatever age, that Santa was Mom and Dad after all. Somehow, that eased my disappointment because what I did was replace one fictional hero with two very real and more important heroes.....What we have experienced recently with the shooting of children shocked us all to the core of our beings. The senseless and tragic loss of life, all life. The rest of the year is filled with death and bleakness, somehow, someone dying around Christmas seems obscene. Especially, a child. This time of the year is for them. Little kids should be with their friend Santa and not going to funerals and memorial services. The only innocent time in life is when you are a child. There is that wonderful bubble that a child should live in. You are protected, or, you should be. Santa is your reward for being in that bubble..... I'd like to think that a small part of my soul still believes in Santa Clause. The optimist in me, who brushes off the madness that the world can so often bring forth, still holds dear that this far away knight in shining red suit, will grant us our fondest wishes. He will always have us in that protective bubble of youth and fairy tales. Santa Claus, the figure, of course, was not real. Santa Clause, the symbol, will never die in my heart..... The line at the mall moved fairly quickly. Soon, kids were jumping on the lap of Santa's helper and telling him what they wanted for Christmas. Dolls. Trains. A bike. A horse!!!! And, some poorly dressed kids just wanted any gift to open. The spirit of the season was very real that day I went. No death. No shootings. No prejudice or hate. Just the feeling of life. That spirit that flows through all of us everyday. When my time came, obviously, I did not sit on Santa's helper's lap. There were a few jokes exchanged among the adults around us. Humor is one of God's finest creations. Finally, Santa asked me what I wanted for Christmas. The answer, especially now, was simple...... ''Peace On Earth. Goodwill Towards Man''.......

My Sister Lisa

We were sitting on the couch as the sad people slowly filed by. You know, that terrible last walk by the casket before you say goodbye to a loved one. It is the final procession for the morners before the casket is closed. My sister and I sat there for our Mom. The line was long with much crying, both Lisa and myself, and the people who had loved our mother. As we shared our tears for the woman who gave both of us life, Lisa turned to me, and, with much love, said, ''Its just you and me, now''.... My sister Lisa was born on October 1, 1956. She was the first child for my parents after trying to conceive for a few frustrating years. There was some concern that my Mom could not have children. So, when little Lisa brightened the world on this great day, a little miracle arrived in my family. Pictures and family video from that time show a beautiful little girl with a twinkle in her eyes and a zest for life. She has never grown out of that look. Now, if you were ever to view our family video [ of which, my brother is in some, and, I, in a blink of an eye ] my sister sure exhibited the flair for the camera. Cut the bullshit: she was a show-off!! She seemed to be the center of any event, always smiling and dancing. Lisa was always close to my Mom's side of the family and there were sure tons of kids to play with on that side. The video shows them all clowning and romping around for any willing audience. There is no sound, but, had there have been, you would have heard the sound of laughter and love. That has always been front and center in my family. We always had a good time with each other. And, in the company of my sister, the fun times were multiplied by her energy and sweet goodness. It is still the same with her today..... A girl on the Scoleri side of the family is very rare. We are all males. I know my sister has always wished for a baby sister to confide in, but, she was saddled with two brothers. And, the word ''saddled'' is written with a smile on my face. Lisa has never minded sharing the family spotlight with her brothers. My brother, Tommy, arrived in 1962, and, Lisa, at the tender age of six, took to him immediately. She helped bathe him and changed his diaper and rocked him. I am no expert on children. I know from first-hand experience with my brother that the realtionship between one child and another can be tricky. Lisa escaped this label. Maybe, she was practicing for her future role as a mother. But, she had endless patience with us boys and became a welcome buffer between me and my brother when we two argued. Lisa always stood up for me and was not afraid to fight my battles. It had to hurt her deeply that her brothers could never get along, but, she never played favorites. Lisa developed the family gene of always fighting and rooting for the underdog...... She loved ''The Mickey Mouse Club'' as a little girl. My parents would always tell me how she would always sing the closing song to the show every day. You may know it. Spelling out the words to Mickey Mouse. '' M-I-C-K-E-Y-M-O-U-S-E''. [ I hear you singing them softly to yourself ] Lisa would sit in front of the TV everyday singing her little heart out to her mouse friend. In a sweet, little girl's voice sent from Heaven. It must be said that Lisa has the only good singing voice in the family. I like to think that somehow, Mickey and The Mouseketeers heard her...... As a teenager, Lisa became a little rebellious. Not a problem--- she never has been---, but, she smoked a little and ditched class some. Actually, it was only gym class when she had to do bowling. Yeah, bowling. Somehow, this sport brought forth a problem. My parents were informed and she was punished. She was the first-born and received all the attention of a first-born, but, she also took the brunt of family punishment. One of the benefits of being born third is that your parents have been trained by your older siblings. Lisa took the hits for me and had to deal with curfew and getting a job and cleaning the house. Oh, I hear about it often, and, I tease her about it. I'm sure Lisa looks at this period as a learning experience. She has always been smart, a lot smarter than she realizes..... Her teeneage and early adult years remain a bit cloudy to me. She graduated from the famous Forest View High School and went to Community College. I really do not know what she wanted to do in life beyond always wanting to be a mother. Whatever career path she could have chosen would have been successful for her. She is smart and industrious. Motherhood, however, always called from her heart. She thought her first love might be the future father of her children. His name was Joe. From what Lisa told me, Joe was the man for her. First love is like that. All consuming and emotional. I was little back then, so, I do not really remember this relationship, but, I know she fell hard for him. And, he was in love with her. He also had the untamed lust of a young man. His attentions and feelings for Lisa, however strong, also found other women. In time, Lisa, as much as it hurt her soul, realized that they must part for life. It was something Lisa never got over. Love found her again, but, never like the love she felt for Joe..... Lisa married in 1980, after being courted and loved by a great guy named John. They were together for a few years before they became husband and wife. John became like a brother to me and fit easily into our family. In 1984, they blessed our family with their first born son, Johnny. A little golden-haired angel from above. Lisa, as a Mom, was as successful as anything she has ever attempted. More so. She gave our own Mom a run for the Best Mom In The World. Lisa fretted over Johnny and worried about his every move. She handled out the discipline when necessary, but, that was not very often because Johnny was a model child. Lisa has always loved children, as most women do, but--- and, this is not always universal with women--- she loved all children. She is as warm and gentle with a strangers child as she is with her own. The innate goodness that flows through her system sparkles mostly with kids. And, in 1989, she and John blessed the family again with the arrival of son number two, Joey. This boy is all Scoleri, while Johnny was a lot like his father. Joey was a moody child. Christ, he was a miserable son of a bitch!! Joey did not like to be held by anyone except Lisa. Joey sensed, at that precious age, how wonderful his Mom's embrace was..... Events unfolded as the years sped by. The horror of the 90's, when sickness and tragedy and death overtook our family. Lisa did handle it well, but, she took our family vanishing before our very eyes as hard as I did. I was on the front lines because she had her own little family to take care of. Lisa always came through when my parents and myself needed her. A simple phone call always brought her running. Plus, she had an added burden to deal with, unbeknownst to me and everyone else: she was dealing with a long-term marriage that was slowly ending..... This shocked what remained of my family. I know it did me. Lisa told me about her marriage ending in 2004. By that time our parents and brother were gone. Ironically, around this time, I also was ending a long-term relationship. There we were, two victims of love, sitting in her living room, crying on each other's shoulders. Lisa had more heartbreak than me because we were talking about her marriage that had ended after almost twenty-five years to someone who was [ and, still is ] a good man. The reasons for the split will reamin private here. There was pain, though. Love brings happiness when it spread its wings, but, we also know that it brings crushing sadness when it ends. From my perspective, things were amicable between her and my now former brother-in-law. Lisa got custody of the kids, who were almost men now. Johnny was twenty and Joey was fifteen. I was sad to see Big John depart the family, even though I knew it was the best for both of them. Lisa was my concern. She had never really been out on her own. Financially, John was very kind to her in the settlement. My worry, though, was when Lisa would decide to start dating. I did not want the wolves out there to prey on her. Lisa has never been the go to a bar and pick up a guy type. I just worried for my sister because I loved her and did not want her hurt. Who would be the next guy in her life became an open question.... Then, like a fairy-tale come to life, the answer came in the form of her first love, Joe. It shows you how one door closes and another one opens. Lisa was divorced for a few months when she went alone to a wedding. At this wedding, she came across someone who knew her lost love. They talked and it turns out that Joe was a free man who had never gotten over my sister. He realized what he had blown and he deeply regretted his loss of her. Lisa became intrigued. Could you go back and try again? She got Joe's number from this person and cautiously debated whether to call him where he was living in Wisconsin. Eventually, she did. Joe was thrilled to hear from her and the past came back for both of them. Whatever worry she may have felt in contacting him melted away as she felt the old stirring of true love again for him. Long story short: from that day forward, they are together  and in love. The old adage that you can't go home again proved, in this case, to be wrong. You can and she did!!!..... This is where she is right now in life. Various people have asked me when I would write a blog about my sister. I hesitated until now because Lisa is so normal. There is no juicy gossip about her. No drama or tempermental behavior. No arrests or violent, selfish episodes. She is no saint, but, she is darn close!!!!..... She is a Grandmother now. Three times. She adores this role in life and, believe me, her Grandchildren sure adore her. And, why not. She has the man of her dreams by her side, with loving and wonderful children and Grandchildren. Many friends and admirers. And, a brother who loves and looks up to her. We have always had a great relationship with each other, partly, because we do not interfere with each other's lives. I am sure she is occasionally wondering which woman I am dating and if I still howl at the moon in the wee hours.  I still am a little protective of her because, as she said at our Mom's funeral: it is just us now..... So, there, my big sister. This is your blog. It is a little taste for people to know a little about you. There is so much more to you than what I have written. My space is limited here. But, my love for you will never be.......

Little Big Man

The word dignity rarely is mentioned nowadays because it seems like very little of it is practiced by human beings. Every show seems to be about exposing whatever behavior is the most outrageous for the sake of a little notoriety. So, when someone does exhibit a touch of class they should be applauded and treasured. And, for the behavior to come from a Hollywood star, then, brother, it borders on being a small miracle.... Michael J. Fox has always been an agreeable actor. He has no special ability other to be very likable in any performance. That is acceptable. Not every actor shows the tremendous range of a Brando. We need the ''likable'' people to watch because after a long day of fighting the world we need someone to put a smile on our faces. Fox has filled that role since coming to prominance in the 80's with the ''Family Ties'' program. The show was mostly fluff, but, it was well done fluff. He was the conservative son of aging hippie parents, with two sisters who ran the gamut from wacky to sweet. The show was conceived to be about the parents, but, Fox rang the bell of teenage popularity. The show shifted its focus more towards him. It was a nice shift. It became more about the family and less about political positions, which it was in danger of becoming. For seven seasons, Fox was ''America's Son'' and first crush for many young girls. Nothing was expected from the show, or, from Michael J.Fox other than solid, wholesome entertainment. The cast did their jobs and the show is a pleasant memory from the 80's.... T.V. success led to movie success for him. ''Back To The Future'' became a tremendous hit in 1985. It was a sharp and whimsical comedy about time travel. Michael J. Fox became a movie star and throughout the late 80's and early 90's, he made a series of soft-entertainment films that played on his likable image. Off-screen, there seemed to be no dirt on this man. He worked in a notoriously backstabbing industry, where truth and reality rarely are joined together. Still, he was spared this hateful, jealous gossip. By all accounts, the decency he displayed in his ''reel'' life was no act in real life..... Around 1991, by his own reckoning, he developed a tremor in his right pinkie. At first, he dismissed it, as we all would, but, in time, the tremor persisted and he went for a physical checkup. The diagnosis was Parkinson's Disease, usually a disease that strikes older people rather than the young. While there is medicine to keep it under control, the long term affects are sobering. You slowly lose the ability to control your body. People have lived for years with this disease, but, like all diseases, it is an unwelcome intruder and monster in your body that will not leave..... Michael J. Fox kept the diagnosis private, at first, by telling only his family and close friends. His wife, Tracy Pollen [ a former co-star on ''Family Ties'' ] and his children formed his support group for his morale. The industry was blissfully unaware of his medical condition when he starred in the T.V. show, ''Spin City''. He kept America smiling while he secretly fought his illness. He did remarkably well. It wasn't until in the late 90's, when the Parkinson's got stronger, that he came before the public and told the full story. This coincided with his decision to leave his hit show. He wanted to spend more time with his family and concentrate on battling his disease. The public, shocked by his condition, rallied around him and sent best wishes from all over the world...... Now, Michael J. Fox, like Christopher Reeve before him with his paralysis, is playing the role of his life. It is a role he did not ask for. For whatever reason, he was chosen by fate to be the face of this cruel disease. This is where his class and dignity come together with his innate decency. He could have hidden behind closed doors [ which everyone would have understood ] , but, he has bravely put his body and soul on display for all to see. He wants to show the world that having Parkinson's Disease, or, any disease, for that matter, is not something to be ashamed of. He is front and center with his affliction, to be ridiculed by the cruel, and, admired by the sympathetic. I count myself in the latter group, as most people will. This brave, little man, has gone before the Big Chiefs in Congressional committees and pleaded for funding into research to cure this disease. His face is now associated with his going to war for not only his life, but, for those not rich and famous enough to be in his spot. He does not need to do this. Certainly, living at home quietly, surrounded by his family, would be easier on his suffering. But, he does not hide from the battle. When he wants his life to be normal and quiet, he lets it. When he knows he is needed for a public event, he goes and furthers his cause. He handles it all very well, but, it must wear him down tremendously. I cannot imagine the days when he struggles to make even the simplest tasks doable. He must know how his appearance makes many uncomfortable, and, how many well-meaning people feel sorry for him. I would guess he does appreciate the concern and sympathy, but, he does not want their pity. He wants to be treated normally, as all victims of illness want. While the disease is very much the elephant in the room, he handles it with aplomb and grace..... While fools parade around on T.V. in the insulting ''reality'' shows, acquiring instant and undeserved fame and fortune from the uniformed public, Michael J. Fox has shown the way an adult should behave. He wants to live, for himself and his family and friends. And, he wants others to live. He is a hero in my book. Not because he is some plastic celebrity who only cares about his own persona, but, rather, because he is a real human being facing life's biggest challenge. I wish him all the luck in the world conquering this cruel twist of fate. At the very moment I write this I hope a medical breakthrough is happening that will cure this bastard disease. I hope he lives long enough to benefit from such cure...... Michael J. Fox won some Emmy Awards playing Alex Keaton on ''Family Ties''. But, his finest work has no trophy. Just the well-deserved title of a good human being and class act......